FAQ

📦 Shipping &  Getting This Stuff To Your Doorstep


Q: When will my order actually ship? I’m decaying over here.

A: Take a deep breath, kitten. Orders are processed within 3–5 business days. I always aim to beat that time but life loves to test my sanity with unexpected plot twists.
Once it leaves our dark little hands, here is the estimated travel time for your order:

  • Within the NL: 3–5 business days.

  • Within the EU: 3–10 business days.

  • Rest of the World: 15–45 business days.

Please note: these timelines are if everything goes great and to plan. Each courier hand-off point works entirely to their own desires, mood swings and staffing levels on any given day. May the odds be ever in your favor that you get it earlier or at least somewhere within these windows.

You’ll get a tracking link sent to your email so you can stare at it intensely, pretending your psychic energy will make the mail truck drive faster.

Q: Where do you ship? Or are you gatekeeping?

A: Me? Gatekeeping? Never! Current shipping locations are the Netherlands, the EU, and 11 other lucky countries across the globe. (Check the dropdown at checkout to see if your corner of the world made the cut). If your country isn’t on the list, don't spiral just yet. Send us a message and we’ll see if we can pull some strings to get our darkness and most delightful delivered straight to your doorstep. 

Q: My tracking says "delivered," but it’s not here. Did the void swallow it?

A: The void, or more likely, your neighbors. Before you panic-message us, check your porch, behind the bushes, in you garden or ask your roommate if they stole it because they have no style of their own. If it’s still missing after 3 days, hit up the carrier— who will no doubt immediately forward you to us, as no carrier likes to be responsible for the items they've been paid to deliver.


💸 Trust Issues & The Corporate Overlords (Payment & Legality)


Q: Are you a legally registered business?

A: Currently? No. Right now, this is a passionate, slightly unhinged and hopeful hobby venture. Look, until I know for absolute certain that this beautiful disaster is going to be a roaring success, I’d rather not flirt badly with the government. The taxman is mean, ugly and clearly derives pleasure from watching emotionally overwhelmed creators suffer. We're keeping things low-key until we're forced to officially introduce ourselves to him. We’re hoping to at least be on speaking terms by then.

Q: Why do you only accept PayPal? Is this a scam or are you just testing me?

A: We know, it sucks balls. The short answer? Because we aren't a formally registered business yet, Shopify's corporate overlords won't let us use their shiny, traditional payment gateways. PayPal is our only option here. 

If you absolutely despise PayPal (valid), you can actually grab the same items over on our Etsy shop instead. They offer way more payment methods, and it's a great alternative if you want to avoid giving PayPal your money.

Q: Why are you also on Etsy? Do you have commitment issues?

A: OmG, you dont?! And this is why we all have therapists. The real reason is that we’re a fresh, new brand, and we totally understand that the internet is a scary place filled with scams. Honestly? No judgment—we don't trust strangers on the internet either, unless they have candy, of course!

Etsy is a long-established platform that people trust. Hooray for corporate safety nets! If you aren't quite ready to take a leap of faith on our standalone site yet, we’d love for you to shop comfortably over there. The catch? Prices are slightly higher on Etsy to cover their corporate overlord soul-sucking platform fees. Think of it as a small tax for your own peace of mind.

🎨 Manifesting Your Dark Thoughts (Custom Requests)

Q: Do you take custom requests? Or do I have to settle for your trauma?

A: YES! We absolutely do. There are hundreds if not thousands of ways to manifest your chaotic energy, so creating a single listing for it would be impossible (and exhausting, I already have anxiety just thinking about it). If you have a vision brewing in that gorgeous, twisted mind of yours—whether it's for custom drinkware or a bag to carry your emotional baggage—slide into our inbox. Let’s collaborate and turn your deeply creative, beautifully dark thoughts into a physical, magical item you’ll treasure forever. Or at least until the hyperfixation wears off.

Q: Are custom items more expensive? Or are you just greedy?

A: Yes, they are. And yes, we know that sucks. Trust us, no one hates paying more than we do—I mean, have you seen this dumpster fire of an economy?

Here’s the thing: custom pieces require way more brain power, precious time, and agonizing effort to perfect (omg, is the perfectionism real). Because we're actually putting additional labor into making your specific fever dream come to life, it costs a bit extra. On the bright side? You’ll walk away with a completely unique, one-of-a-kind piece dedicated entirely to your beautifully eccentric, over-the-top taste. You can't put a price tag on that level of main-character energy, oh wait, we do.

💔 Returns & Regret

Q: Can I change or cancel my order?

A: If you ordered a custom or made-to-order piece, you have a strict 1-hour window after purchasing to email us, if you made a mistake. Once I start handcrafting your specific fever dream, it’s locked in. 

If you ordered a standard, ready-to-ship item, you can cancel it before it leaves our hands. If the void has already claimed it and it has already shipped, you'll have to wait for it to arrive and send it back to us. Just know that you will be entirely responsible for covering the return shipping costs to get it back to me. 

Q: What is your return policy? (It’s not me, it’s you).

A: We get it, commitment is terrifying (ask many of the men I've dated). We accept returns within 14 days of delivery for store credit or refunds. The items must be unworn, unwashed, and completely free of makeup stains, pet hair or the tears of your enemies.
🖤 Note: Final sale items are truly final. Just like the closing down of your favorite 2000s emo band. No exceptions.

Q: How do I start a return without having to talk to a human?

A: Look, I truly respect the social anxiety—I live it every single day. But unfortunately, you do have to deal with a human fleshbag to get this sorted. The good news? She’s lovely, unless you catch her on a particularly cursed day.

To start a return, just swallow your fear and email me at shopnotemma@gmail.com with your request. I promise to make the process as painless as humanly possible, and we'll take it from there.

📇 Existential Crises

Q: How do I contact customer service if I’m actually having a crisis?

A: If it’s an order crisis, email us at support@yourstore.com. We answer within 24 hours (Monday–Friday), unless we're currently having our own scheduled breakdowns.



The TL;DR Terms & Policies (Because Life is Too Short for Fine Print)

Look, we know life is way too short to read actual Terms & Conditions. Seriously, it would take like three days, and honestly, legal shit is never straightforward or easy to understand. So, to save us both from an existential crisis, here is a very high-level, chaotic-but-honest overview of our policies.

(But also, if you are a glutton for punishment and this super high-level summary doesn't quite tickle the itch, you can find the dense, boring, and legally official full T&Cs tucked away in the footer of our site.)

💔 The Return & Drama Policy

  • The Clock is Ticking: You have 14 days from delivery to request a return. Emo kids in the EU get the same 14 days, no questions asked, because European laws actually care about your buyers' remorse.

  • Keep it Clean: The item must be unused, unwashed, unworn, and not covered in pet hair or tears (yours or those of your enemies).

  • You Pay to Send it Back: Email us at shopnotemma@gmail.com to start a return. We don't do prepaid labels, so you’ll have to pay for your own return postage. Use tracking or the mail void might swallow it.

  • Exchanges: We don't do traditional exchanges. Get your return approved, return the item you hate, receive confirmation your return has arrived and your refund is being process and then buy the new thing you actually want.

  • Absolutely No Returns On: Sale items, gift cards, or custom orders. You bought it, you own it.

💸 The Money Part

  • Once we inspect your return and confirm you didn't ruin it, we'll refund your original payment method within 10 business days. Banks are slow, so give them a minute. If it's been 15 business days and the bank is still hiding your money from you, email us.

📦 Shipping & Survival Guide

  • Ready-to-Ship Items: Out the door in 3 to 5 business days.

  • Custom/Made-to-Order Pieces: These are handcrafted from pure hyperfixation. Give us 20 to 30 business days to birth them into existence before they ship.

  • Travel Times: Once shipped, it takes 2–5 days for the NL, 5–12 days for the EU, and 10–45 days for the rest of the world (blame customs, international politics, the direction of the wind, or Mercury being in retrograde for the absolute absurdity of that delivery window).

  • Duties: If you live outside the EU, you might (very likely) get hit with customs fees. That financial transaction is strictly between you and your government, which you are solely responsible for paying. 
    To my US besties: thanks to the current political landscape and given the current administration's absolute obsession with tariffs, the odds of you getting dinged are incredibly high. Don’t hate the seller, hate the system, please direct your rage at the White House, not my inbox. 

🚨 Oopsies & Disasters

  • Inspect Immediately: Check your items the second they arrive, we already know you’re going to tear into that box the moment it hits your doorstep with the manic vigor of a raccoon digging through premium trash. If something is broken, defective or god forbid I sent the wrong thing (I'm already sweating from the sheer secondary embarrassment of this hypothetical scenario), email us within 14 days with photos so we can make it right.

  • Addresses: Double-check your address at checkout. If you send it to your ex's house by mistake, we can’t save you. Though, let’s be honest, your ex will definitely end up keeping it and loving it, unless they have utterly tragic taste... which just proves they have terrible judgment. No wonder they’re an ex.

  • Stolen Packages: Once the courier marks it as "Delivered," it is officially out of our hands. Keep an eye on your tracking so the porch pirates (bastards!) don't win.